Sunday, February 21, 2010

Every Day

I got in my car the other day coming home from work and this song was on the radio.

And it brought me back to February 12, 2002. It was my birthday and it had been a hard day. You see, for 27 years the my mother had been the first person to wish me a happy birthday. From the time I was a baby, to a child, to a teen, to a young adult, to an adult. No matter where I was, my mother called me first thing in the morning on my my birthday to tell me happy birthday. To let me know that February 12th was not only special to me, but special to her as well. And February 12, 2002 was my second birthday without hearing from my mother. Chris and I had been dating for a few months. I had seen him at work that day, but I remember about mid morning leaving work and taking the rest of the day off because it was just turning out to be one of those days that you just shouldn't get out of bed. I went home, sulked around, walked Lou and Buddy, cried off and on all day. And around 8pm, I guess I had just reached the peak of loneliness and I called Chris and asked him to come over. I was crying and he came over. I will never forget him coming in my room and finding me balled up crying in the floor and he just held me. I wonder what he thought at the time? What kind of crazy am I getting myself into????? And I can tell you without hesitation, that losing your mother at such a young age IS a whole lot of crazy. Rascal Flatts describes it perfectly when they say "you could have bowed out gracefully, but you didn't; you knew enough to know to leave well enough alone, but you wouldn't." And "every day" since then he has saved me. Sometimes from the pits of depression and other times from the throws of anger. He is faithful. He always does what I ask of him (even if I feel like I shouldn't have to ask i.e. pick up your dirty clothes from the floor). And most recently, he just goes to church with me. He just does it. We don't fight about it. I don't have to beg, borrow or steal. He gets up with me on Sunday and he knows this is what we are going to do now. And he even said today that the pastor "speaks" to him. My response was, the Holy Spirit is speaking to you. He laughed me off and said "maybe he just keeps me interested more than the pastor at St Paul"; bless his heart. Whatever the case, it thrills me. Every Day.


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